How to Prepare for Therapy and What to Expect in Your First Session
Starting therapy is a big step, and for many people, it can feel both exciting and intimidating. You may have searched for online therapists in California or Utah and finally found someone you want to reach out to. Or maybe you’re still in the process of narrowing down who might be a good fit. Either way, it’s natural to wonder what the process looks like — from the first phone call to sitting down in that initial session.
Taking the time to understand what happens in those early steps can ease some of the anxiety or hesitancy you might feel. Therapy isn’t about being perfect or knowing exactly what to say. It’s about showing up as you are and finding support from someone who can walk alongside you in the healing process.
What Is an Initial Consultation?
Before scheduling a session, many therapists will offer a short phone consultation. This is usually a 10–15 minute call where you’ll share a little about why you’re seeking therapy, and the therapist will explain their approach. Think of it less like an interview and more like a conversation. The therapist wants to know what you’re struggling with, and you want to get a feel for whether this is someone you could see yourself working with.
You don’t need to prepare a long list of details about your life story before this call. Instead, a helpful step is to think ahead about what matters most to you in a therapist. Do you want someone who shares your faith? Do you need someone who has worked with specific issues like addiction, anxiety, or relationship struggles? Are you looking for someone who gives homework in between sessions? Do you desire a therapist who does a lot of listening, or one who gives more direct feedback and suggestions? These kinds of questions can help guide the conversation and give you a sense of whether this could be a good fit for you.
Questions You Might Ask
During the consultation, it’s okay — and even encouraged — to ask questions of your own. A few that many people find helpful are:
“How have you helped clients with my issue in the past, and what does success usually look like?”
“Do you have experience working with clients from my faith background or worldview?”
“What is your fee, and how frequently will we be meeting?”
“Do you give homework or resources that I can use between sessions?”
“What should I do if I feel like therapy isn’t working?”
These questions not only give you practical answers but also give you a feel for how the therapist responds. Are they approachable? Do they explain things clearly? Do they seem open to feedback? These impressions are just as important as the words themselves.
What to Expect in Your First Session
After the consultation, if you decide to move forward, you’ll schedule a first session. This is where the real work begins, but it’s also still part of the “getting to know each other” stage.
In your first session, you can expect your therapist to want to learn more about you, your background, and your goals. Many people are surprised by how much talking they end up doing in that first hour. Your therapist will guide with questions, reflect back what they hear, and help you start naming the challenges that brought you in. It may feel a little vulnerable to open up at first, but remember: the goal is to create a safe space where you can be honest and begin your journey toward healing.
In my own sessions, I focus on creating a warm and compassionate environment right from the start. I want you to feel heard and understood, not judged or rushed. By the end of the session, I summarize the main things we talked about and suggest a few initial steps we can take together to help you move forward. This way, you leave with a sense of direction, not just a conversation.
How Long Does Therapy Usually Last?
One of the most common questions people have when starting therapy is, “How long will this take?” The answer depends on what you’re coming in for.
If you’re dealing with a recent situation or a one-time stressor, you may find that 6–12 sessions are enough to feel stronger and more equipped to move forward. On the other hand, if you’re working through something deeper — like an addiction you’ve struggled with for years, or relational wounds that have built up over time — the process may take longer. That doesn’t mean therapy goes on forever. The goal is always growth and healing, not dependency. But lasting change, especially when it comes to issues like pornography addiction, betrayal, or trauma, often requires more time and commitment.
The most important thing to know is that therapy is flexible. It’s not about following a rigid timeline, but about giving yourself the space you need to heal.
Moving Forward
Taking the first step toward therapy is something to be proud of. Whether you’re scheduling a consultation call or preparing for your first session, remember that this is about creating a safe place to work on yourself and your relationships. Therapy isn’t just about talking through problems — it’s about discovering healthier ways to cope, reconnecting with your values, and moving toward the life you want.
For more information on how to find the right therapist you can check out my blog post, “Finding A Therapist That Is Right For You.”
Alex Primo
Marriage and Family Therapist, CSAT
I specialize in helping Christian men find freedom from pornography and unwanted sexual behaviors. I also work with couples who are navigating the pain of betrayal and infidelity.
If this connects with what you are looking for in a therapist, give me a call or reach out to me through my contact form HERE, and ask me the questions mentioned in this blog. The therapeutic relationship goes both ways, and I want to provide a place you feel safe to share, free from any judgement or shame. You don’t have to figure this out alone. Healing is possible, and the first session is where it can begin.